JOY in His presence

 "Lord, you are my God;  I will exalt you. I will  praise your name,  for you have  accomplished wonders,  plans formed long ago,  with perfect faithfulness." 

What is there to say about someone, who you didn't want to meet? Yes, I was NOT excited before Susan returned to Costa Rica for a visit. Hear me out.  I was first introduced to the idea of "Susan" when I was told my host brother's fish was named after her. ( her name is Suzanne, but in Costa Rica its Susan- equal to my Ana) A beloved friend and "auntie" to my newest 4 year old buddy. Susan lived with my host family for 8 months earlier this year. She was here to visit for 3 weeks- which flew by!!  Ever since she was 5 years old she has had the dream to be a nurse on Mercy Ships, finally to come true this January. So logically she had to come visit for 3 weeks, before her adventure in West Africa. ( I like the way she thinks) Not only is she a great "auntie" to our host brother, but also to her 9, soon to be 10 nieces and nephews stateside. She dotes on them, prioritizes them, and might even out do me in the "spoiling aunt" category.

Language is a continual process, but once phrases and vocab are mastered (LOL I'm far from mastering even the simplest of these) there is another level of appreciation for another language. The cultural nuances. At the end of every good bye- most Costa Ricans say "Si Dios Queire" "If God wants". (for the record my Latin American exposer us limited to CR, not sure if this translates into other Spanish speaking countries) It is becoming easier to pronounce, but not easier to say. I stutter, and hesitate- stringing the words out for longer than they sound. To be honest,  I am not familiar with this constant welcoming of Jesus into every moment. Appreciating God's control over every future step- the day-to-day, the moment-bymoemnt, the now. Grocery shopping, taking the bus, you name it and they say this phrase. It may be cultural but for me it is a weighted prayer. A conscious effort to let Jesus be the center of my days.

Ask my 6 weeks ago to describe myself, and one of my first choice words would have been independent.  I was proud of being free to move locations freely, travel, and bop around on countless long weekend escapades. Care free, prioritizing myself, controlling of my little world- all these are pieces of my independence. Fast forward to this morning... DO EVERYTHING IN DEPENDENCE ON ME. The desire to act independently-- apart from ME- springs from the root of pride. Self-sufficiency is subtle, insinuating its way into your thoughts and actions without your realizing it. But apart from Me, you can do nothing: that is, nothing of eternal value. My deepest desire for you is that you learn to depend on Me in every situation. I move heaven and earth to accomplish this purpose, but you must collaborate with Me in this training. Teaching you would be simple if I negated your free will or overwhelmed you with My Power. However, I love you too much to withdraw the godlike privilege I bestowed